What I Learned From The Flu

This has been a strange week, lived in a haze, yet lived in unusual clarity. Every member of our household has had the flu. It knocked everyone of us out for a full week. Many days at least one of us was unable to get out of bed. Our youngest was the first to get it, with a fever reaching 105 one night…scary stuff for this mama. Now our oldest is the last one in the worst of it. As I write this, she is on the sofa behind me. This girl never stops and rarely gets sick, so it’s hard to see her so miserable as it has been with them all.

Before I became sick, I was taking care of the 3 who were already bedridden, including David. I was happy to take care of them. I have this magical belief that I can make people better. Not just me, actually; I believe we all have the capacity to heal each other through touch, kindness, and just emanating from a positive place of peace and love.

Deep inside I also had thoughts of practical concerns…did I pay all of the bills, how would I plan David’s 50th birthday party in just a week if I became ill, I was going to be late with some customers’ orders, I would have to pause my Design Challenge (https://www.facebook.com/events/167893720081230), etc., etc. David and I had just had one of our meetings days before and we were excited to get going on our page full of tasks for our businesses and home. I didn’t want to lose my momentum, but I am glad I did. Here is what being sick and caring for my family for one week has taught me:

~I am so thankful for my health and for the health of my family. We dealt with this for a week. Everyone is recovering. Gratitude.

~I actually do like the chaos that sometimes engulfs this house. The silence was eerie, unnatural for a house with a 10 year old and two 8 year olds with a lot of friends. (Don’t tell them this, but I even found myself missing the sound of the front door slamming…shhh!)

~I am more kind, loving and peaceful than I believed. I am assuming that the body focuses energy on the essential parts when it is in limited supply. I felt a strange, beautiful bliss (could have been helped by the fever) that allowed me to see what it feels like to live without worry, anger and fear. Amazing. Peaceful. Infinite. I told David that I loved living like this, not worrying about deadlines or schedules or bills or doing…just being. Of course, the next morning when the internet was down because I forgot to pay the bill, I had to acquiesce that there has to be some middle ground. I long to live in the world of “being”, yet there also has to be “doing.”

~I have amazingly kind, understanding and compassionate customers. Orders were delayed, emails unchecked, Facebook unattended and my design challenge frozen. I reached out to those whose ship dates would be affected and every single one was so incredibly kind and understanding. You have no idea what a gift that was to me. I must be attracting the right people with my jewelry because I have THE best customers!

~I have been reminded once again this week that I am very loved. Our kids were so incredibly sweet and loving this week. When I was unable to take care of everyone, Sophie took over despite her fear of getting sick. She showed so much love and courage. My mom checked on us all week. And David…those moments of just being brought clarity and gratitude. He is so incredibly loving and patient and caring to our kids, to me. I have had a rough year and when I look in his eyes and still see nothing but love…wow! Gratitude.

Things are returning to normal…I hear banging from the boys’ room, neighborhood kids are knocking on the door again, I’m feeling the push to complete my orders, we are making plans for the week…

I want to stay in this space as the world comes back into focus. Love. Peace. Kindness. Starting within, then this home and infinitely beyond that.

This Monday orders will resume shipping and my Design Challenge will begin again! Thank you all so much for sticking with me!

Love to you,
K